[The SHR Method]


A pattern I’ve noticed in charismatic people?

They don’t try to be interesting. They make the other person feel interesting.

How? There are 3 powerful steps to the SHR Method.

Make them feel Seen, Heard, and Remembered.

Let’s dive into each one…


1. Seen

Give a real compliment. The kind that sparks an interesting story they can tell you about…

  • Chatting virtually? It could be the art hanging on their wall.

  • In person? Maybe it’s something they’re wearing.

  • Bonus points if you notice their “thing of pride” (that most others don’t ask about).

Keep your eye contact strong, and your phone away. Show that you’re fully engaged and they have your complete attention. (It’s surprisingly rare).

2. Heard

(Pre-meeting) Write down meaningful questions. Review previous messages you’ve exchanged so they’re fresh.

(Mid-meeting) Recap their important points so they feel understood. “So what I’m hearing is…”; “I love that you said…”

(Post-meeting) Always send a note. Always. It could be an email, text, ping, etc. If the meeting was work-related, list your big takeaways + next steps. (4-5 bullets is ideal).

End it with something warm, like an inside joke.

3. Remembered

• Keep a list of tiny, personal details about them. Add more to the list every time you connect.

• People are always endeared when you remember their pet’s name, their child’s birthday, an upcoming vacation they’ve planned…

• Include these in your thank-you note, and keep them top-of-mind the next time you connect.


The secret (and paradox) of charisma?

It’s not about being interesting. It’s about being interested.

Try these 3 things, and you’ll instantly stand out from the rest.

“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou

Until next week,


P.S. Are you ready to build your own audience and grow on social media? You can now book a private, 45-min coaching session with me. I’ve worked with aspiring creators, marketing agencies, authors, high-growth brands, and executives at Fortune 100 companies. Learn more and view my availability here (currently booking 2+ weeks out). 🔥

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